Question:
“I’ve had it up to here with marriage apps and websites. It’s just the same people over and over again. None of the people I match with match back with me and I’ve received so many weird messages. I feel like I’m just wasting my time and I’m starting to feel down about it.”
Answer:
I’d recommend you do these 5 things right now:
1. Throw your phone in the bin.
Okay, fine. You can keep your phone, but delete the app that’s been doing your head in.
2. Create space in your schedule to spend more time in public places, where you can interact with people in 3D.
These don’t have to be networking or ‘marriage’ events. You can just go hang out in a cafe to read a book (ideally in an area frequented by Muslims)
3. Make your goal: “Micro-Interactions”
These are small, pleasant interactions you can have with people in real life. Before dumb-phones people used to do this all the time. It wasn’t even a thing. Read your book, but keep your awareness open.
Notice everyone who walks in and out. Make your goal to interact – even a small gesture, smile (it’s sunnah!), or small talk with whoever’s near you and seems to be open to it.
4. Watch this interview where I talk with a leading relationship expert and we go into how Micro-Interactions work, in-depth: www.mamoonyusaf.com/michelle
We even covered ways that a woman can approach a man, without putting herself in the masculine position and ticking all of his “she’d make a great wife” boxes.
5. Come back round and let go of any negativity you once had towards the apps & websites.
The Inner Salam Method is a wonderful way to do this and a great skill to make big goals like this feel easy and joyful.
This is the last email I’ll be sending about the free training interview with relationship expert Michelle Marchant Johnson, where we both shared some of our best ideas on how to improve your love life and create the next, most awesome chapter of your life.
Check it out here:
Peace, Love & Blessings.
Mamoon
P.S. I’ve known Michelle for well over 15+ years. When I was going through a divorce and felt insecure working with single women, I sent all my relationship clients to her and she took great care of them, for which I’m eternally grateful. And her summits are always stellar. Check it out on the link above.
