Last week, by the grace of God, I turned 40.
When I look back over the last 10 years, there are a few things I wish I knew back then… but I’m sure as heck glad that I know them now.
- Invest. Now. Compound “interest” is amazing. And it’s not haram, which is what I used to assume, when I was a naive, broke student (…that is, assuming the money’s invested in good, noble companies and/or property that give you an annual return, based on their growth).
£1,000 a month will make you a millionaire in about 25 years. The time will pass anyway. This way, you can live the rest of your life off the return you get from that £1MM worth of investments. (Or keep working and 40 years from now, you’ll be a multi-millionaire and leave a massive inheritance and/or perpetual charity funds. Make it happen.) How much you invest on a monthly basis is actually less important than how early you start. On that note, look up Dave Ramsey… And follow the ‘baby steps’ for what to do with your money, before it slips through your fingers (which it will, just like time – if you don’t plan for how to invest it). Set this up this right and you will literally never have to think or worry about money ever again. - Learn the Quran. It’s worth way more than money. As the Prophet, peace and blessings upon him asked his companions:
“Want to know what’s more valuable than a fat red she-camel? A verse of the Quran. Want to know what’s more valuable that two fat, red she-camels? Two verses of the Quran.”
Note: even today, these animals are worth a LOT. Like, more than a good car. If each Quran verse is actually worth more than a car… how many are you willing to learn? - Learn JiuJitsu. Especially if you’re a woman. Ever notice how in every single action movie there’s a scene where a guy grabs a woman by the neck? I want every woman in my family to know exactly how to break a guy’s arm if they ever do that to you. It’s basic JiuJitsu. You can learn the essentials in a few weeks by following a syllabus like Gracie University.
- Pray and prepare for your Optimal Partner. They’re right around the corner. Don’t settle for someone you’re not crazy about or someone with different values or a different vision for life. They’ll drive you crazy in the wrong way and you’ll end up coming to me for marriage advice when you’re already heading for divorce. Save yourself a ton of time, energy and drama by waiting patiently for your Optimal Partner to sweep you off your MuzMatch app.
- Treat your wife the same way you did when you were hoping, wishing and praying that she would marry you. She will notice if you don’t. And you’ll be rewarded in this life and the next if you do. Be grateful for the love you have and it will increase. Take it for granted, and it may be taken away. Every few of weeks, I talk to a guy who was sent to me by his wife as a ‘last resort’, because he didn’t realise how much damage it does to the marriage to take her for granted.
- Trust the systems that you absolutely know work – based on your own personal experience. Training, diet, marriage, money, business, productivity – there are reliable systems that improve all of them… and when you don’t follow those systems, those areas of life tend to get worse. The time will pass anyway, but follow those systems, and your life gets better, easier, more enjoyable and more fun every year.
- Ask yourself the ultimate “On Track” question: Is what I did over the last week going to inevitably lead me to where I want to be 10 years from now? If not, make some structural changes to your weekly flow so that your long-term success becomes inevitable.
For example, if you ultimately want to be a hafiz… are you actually memorising the Quran every single week? If you want to be a best-selling author… did you write anything this week? If you want to be ripped… you get the picture. This is essentially the only goal-setting secret you need to become externally successful… if you actually implement it. - Be Grateful for what you’ve got and how far you’ve already come. After fixing your weekly schedule to make your goals inevitable, shift your focus. Instead of focusing on the ‘gap’ between where you are and where you want to be, focus on the ‘gain’ of how far you’ve already come and how blessed you are to be here, now. This leads you into Presence and Gratitude which naturally leads to a joyful life. (Hat tip to Tiamo Devetorri for that insight).
- Last, but not least, the most essential advice for my 20, 30, 40 and 100 year old self:
Know that the only cause of your feelings is your thinking in the moment that you’re having the feeling. Nothing else can ever determine the way you feel, no matter how wonderful or terrible it may be.
This insight alone, when fully realised, will save you a lifetime of internal hardship that is so “normal” to your way of being that you won’t even realise how much silent suffering you were going through, until it’s gone. When it’s gone, it’s gone forever. And you’ll wonder how you ever lived without knowing this simple, profound, mind-quietening truth.
Okay, I’ll jump off my nostalgic soap box now.
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